Fairness

Valentine’s Day: Love Not Pain

~ Laurie Samuel ~ Leave a comment

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner.  Dinner reservations have been made and the night will bring flowers, candy, and cards.  For some women however, the dinner will be thrown to the floor in anger, cards will be ripped to pieces, and nothing sweet will pass their lips.  For them, the night means walking on egg shells in fear and fists driven into her chest and back.  For some, the one they love, the one they call husband, boyfriend, or partner is the one who inflicts the most pain.  Pain borne out of insecurity.  Pain borne out of misplaced blame.  Pain borne out of pure evil.  Love is not supposed to hurt.  But the chances are you know a woman that is in an abusive relationship and the beatings have become her norm.

Here are the facts:

  • Every 17 minutes, a woman in Canada is sexually assaulted;
  • 1 in 3 women will experience physical, sexual, and/or psychological violence in her lifetime;
  • College age women are three times more likely to experience sexual violence than any other age group; and
  • Domestic violence homicide is one of the leading causes of death among black women 15-35 years of age.

Love is not supposed to hurt.  Love is not supposed to hit.  Love is not supposed to kill.  This is not love.  Sadly, victims often suffer in silence.  They do not tell because they truly love their partners.  They do not tell because they are embarrassed.  They do not tell because leaving may mean loss of financial support.  And they do not tell because they do not want to hand over the person they love to the police.

Using the body of a woman as a punching bag to work out one’s anger is wrong, monstrous, and criminal.  Increasing awareness, knowing the signs of abuse, and providing safe spaces to victims is key.  These statistics no longer need to be our reality.  Our young girls and women deserve more and need our help.  Let’s end this now.  Change the norm.  Know the signs.  Acknowledge the behavior.  Condemn abusers and help the victims.

Be safe,

L.J.

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Twitter: @Cupids_Sting

#lauriesamuel #crimedoc #valentinesday #2020 #love #notpain #domesticviolence #violenceagainstwomen #genderbasedviolence #awareness #prevention #reduction #cupidssting #nonprofit #resources #safety #DC #Toronto #GTA #Brampton #PeelRegion #Antigua #Caribbean #womensissues #globalissues

Dr. L.J. Samuel is an Author and Criminologist working in Washington, DC, Toronto, ON, and St. John’s, Antigua.  She is the founder of the non-profit Cupid’s Sting where she teaches women live-saving skills to reduce their potential victimization.  She may be reached at info@cupidssting.org.

Assaulted Women’s Helpline 1-866-863-0511

The National Domestic Violence Hotline may be reached at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).

References

Jones, F.  (2014).  Why black women struggle more with domestic violence.  Time.  Retrieved from http://time.com/3313343/ray-rice-black-women-domestic-violence/.

National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.  (2014).  Domestic violence fact sheet.
Colorado: National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.

Photo by: Sydney Sims, Unsplash.com

Where do we go from here?

~ Laurie Samuel ~ Leave a comment

image

(Source: Lorena O’Neal, http://www.esquire.com)

I am a black woman. I love my black men. But that does not mean I hate white men or Asian women, or Latino men. Another label I wear is criminologist. I study crime, I work with the police, I seek justice when there is wrongdoing. So I am grappling with how to articulate my feelings over the events of the past two days. Numb? So much sadness. Over what? Hate. At first I thought that race was the underlying factor but I’m not so sure anymore. We have gotten to a point where we no longer respect human life no matter the outer shell. One act does not condone another. Are we not better than that? We have to be. Or is this the beginning of our own self aniliation?

I know some are going to argue that this is history repeating itself but the Lord says “vengeance is mine.” Therefore, it is not ours. To cheer the murder or five Dallas police officers who were simply doing their job is shameless. Not one of them was responsible for taking the life of Alton Sterling or Philando Castile.  I get it. There is a feeling of helplessness but how can this be a solution? A violent response will only increase the violence directed at the very group you mourn for. This is not the way. We are all hurting. Deeply. A generational hurt. But black people are a resilient people so we must figure out a way (yes we have been here before) to heal and figure out a solution that goes beyond DOJ canned responses that breaks through the blue barrier where a respect and appreciation for all life is the starting point of where the police operate from. If not, there will be more death, more violence, more hate, more crying, more arguing, and no change.  And we will continue on this hamster wheel of violence, death, and destruction.

Be safe,

L.J.

Follow me on Twitter: @CrimeDoc1213

#police #policeviolence #policeshootings #blackmen #AltonSterling #PhilandoCastile #Louisiana #Minnesota #policeaccountabilty #policereform #peace #protest #DallasPolice #peacefulprotest #blacklivesmatter #bluelivesmatter #alllivesmatter #hope #change #love

Black and Gold in a Post-Racial Discussion

~ Laurie Samuel ~ Leave a comment

“They scoff and speak wickedly concerning oppression.”
Psalm 73:8

A few years ago I had the opportunity to participate in the Multicultural Teaching Scholars Program while I was in graduate school.  I had the distinct pleasure of being assigned to the University of Missouri.  My experience was wonderful.  There were great students, great faculty, and a great campus.  The lack of diversity was not so great but not unexpected at large, traditional campus.  Imagine my disappointment when Mizzou dominated the news for their handling of racial issues a few weeks ago.  There were stories of white students taunting black students and using ugly racial slurs.  A report surfaced about the use of racial images including a swastika outlined in feces in a student dorm.  These recent incidents brought Mizzou’s problem with race to a boiling point. Black students argued they raised these issues with the administration for years and nothing had been done.  There were calls for the resignation of the president and provost and still nothing.  Missouri’s own Lieutenant Governor argued that there was little evidence of racism when asked about the issue (Graves & Knott, 2015).  The university’s defense was that they didn’t know these issues were occurring on campus.  It was not until the predominantly black football team took a stand and refused to practice or play that the university started to pay attention.  The Twitter pictures showing solidarity among black players and white players and coaches were telling.

According to the University of Missouri website, “Mizzou has a diverse enrollment with 35,000 students.”  At the University of Missouri, diversity equates to a student population that is 9% black and nearly 73% white.  In addition, of the nearly 1,600 faculty that are tenured or on the tenure track, only 302 are black.  (These figures do not include part-time or non-tenure track faculty).  How does one truly learn, appreciate, and understand different kinds of people, cultures, backgrounds, and viewpoints in such a sanitized environment?

The threat of the school losing money if the football program halted made the board take real notice.  College football is a multi-million dollar industry and a life line to these schools.  It was the economic threat and not the desire to truly do what is right in the face of racism, oppression, and discrimination that prompted closed door meetings, national discussion and ultimately the loss of jobs and the penning of new policy. In 2015.  Curious.  And the hiring of a diversity officer.  I wonder why such a position did not exist before?  Furthermore, Mizzou’s exposure led other schools to re-evaluate the complaints they received from minority students.  In 2015. Other schools are now patting themselves on the back for being innovative in the area of diversity and inclusion because they have crafted new diversity policies.  In 2015.

So I leave you with this.  If we as some argue live in a post-racial society, then why are we so uncomfortable discussing race??

Be safe,

L.J. Follow me on Twitter: @CrimeDoc1213

#Mizzou #UniversityofMissouri #racism #racialissues #racismoncampus #swastika #2015 #discrimination #oppression #football #footballplayers #diversity #inclusion #rights #bravery #change #ljsamuel #deardiary #justice

References

Ballentine, S. (2015, November, 21). Mizzou facing image crisis after racial issues upheaval. Yahoo! News. Retrieved from http://news.yahoo.com/mizzou-facing-image-crisis-racial-issues-upheaval-171036887.html

Graves, A. & Knott, K. (2015, November, 22). Missouri politician wrongly claims ‘zero’ evidence of swastika incident on Missouri campus. Political Fact Missouri. Retrieved from http://www.politifact.com/missouri/statements/2015/nov/22/peter-kinder/missouri-politician-wrongly-claims-zero-evidence-s/

University of Missouri. (2015). Demographics. University of Missouri website. Retrieved from www.missouri.edu

 

Humanity Lost

~ Laurie Samuel ~ 1 Comment

praying

What a week.  So much violence, sadness, and turmoil.  Escaped murderers and cop killers.  Rape and murder of a 16 year-old innocent.  And the unthinkable tragedy of the brutal, senseless killing of nine souls praying in a house of worship. The world has a gaping wound and oozing out is hurt and pain.

Whenever there is a tragedy, the media highlights the name and handiwork of the evil doer a million times.  The victims are often the secondary story.  There are even times that stories are slanted to suggest victims of violent, unspeakable crimes are not innocent and blameless.  Let’s not demonize victims.  It disrespects their memory, diminishes the agony families are facing, and presents an excuse or defense for the perpetrator of the crime.

I cannot fathom what goes through a person’s mind when they are planning murder.  Where is the sense of conscience?  Where is the respect for life?  Where is the deference to that which is holy and sacred?  And how is it that once again we are at a point in history where the issues of race are sparking such venom and hatred to lead one to murder nine people in cold blood?  Where does that come from?  How does an innocent child brought into this world grow up to hate a group of people so much because of the color of their skin that he wants to annihilate them?  There is an indoctrination which most certainly began in the home.  These thoughts, feelings, and actions were encouraged.  And sadly since symbols of hate fly on flag posts outside state government buildings, then there is an unspoken acceptance of these ideals.

We have to do better.  We’re destroying each other- in the name of race, gender, or political affiliation.  This cannot go on.  Now, more than ever, we need to come together.  In honor of the nine brave people that lost their lives on Wednesday, June 17, 2015 as they sat in their church for bible study, we have to root out this hate.  And let’s not forget their names and the good they did while here on Earth doing God’s work.

The Emanuel 9

  1. The Honorable Rev. Clementa Pinckney, 41 years old
  2. Ms. Cynthia Hurd, 54 years old
  3. Ms. Susie Jackson, 87 years old
  4. Ms. Ethel Lance, 70 years old
  5. Rev. DePayne Middleton-Doctor, 49 years old
  6. Mr. Tywanza Sanders, 26 years old
  7. Rev. Daniel Simmons, Sr., 74 years old
  8. Rev. Sharonda Singleton, 45 years old
  9. Ms. Myra Thompson, 59 years old

We cannot go on like this.  Be kind to one another.  Love.  Love one another.  Love. Love one another whether black or white, male or female.  Just love.

God bless the souls of the Emanuel 9, Emanuel AME Church, Charleston, SC.

Be safe,

L.J.
Follow me on Twitter: @CrimeDoc1213

#Emanuel9 #IAmAME #Charleston #humanity #peace #love #blessings #prayer #black #white #justice #fairness #crime #violence #BlackLivesMatter #respect

Image Source: celebrationoffamily.com